Posted by Gordy on 1/26/2003, 9:33 am,

I have been thinking and praying about the situation here. I wish I had some profound and helpful insights to share but I don't. Many times in my life I have had to try and remedy exasperating and complex problems. I have learned that everything can't be fixed all the time but improvements, whether incremental or significant, can be made. I usually start with attempting to break large complex problems down into simpler segments. This can help people see the problem a little better versus trying to comprehend the whole enchilada at once. Those not interested in trying to come to some resolution (and I totally understand why that would be the case) will probably just be irritated with me trying to make some positive headway. For those that do want to see something beneficial occur I offer some suggestions. So here goes.

I think Don and everyone else must take an inventory and evaluate their true motives, what they are trying to accomplish and why. This is tricky as we have a tendency to be extremely defensive. The result/cause of improper defensiveness usually is self deception and makes seeing the truth difficult if not impossible. If we can't truthfully and effectively start there then there is no point of going any further for obvious reasons. If there was a way to get our true motives clearly defined it would a good start to making the best of this situation.

It is my opinion that Don needs to clearly identify what his motives are in this matter. I won't offer any personal opinion in this post but offer some possible choices. There are two primary motives that come to mind. The first being self gain and the second would be the antithesis of self, wanting others to benefit even at the expense of self. Needless to say, this is not an easy task but it is crucial to build upon truth so the result will stand the tests surely to follow.

Establishing true motives also apply to those who stand opposed to Don. A couple of years ago I posted a question on this board that I will paraphrase. I asked what would everyone do if Don truly repented and did everything he could do to make things right. What if we, like a cat chasing a bird, actually caught the bird? What would we do with it? Tear it apart and eat it, play with it, or after the chase and capture just walk away looking for other challenges? What do we want? There isn't one answer here as we all have different issues.

Motivations are primary. I do not see any chance of beneficial results unless everyone has an accurate grasp on what their true motives are. Maybe it is impossible or maybe the time still isn't upon us to do so. I guarantee there will be a day in the future when all true motives will be revealed and judged. If the motives here by either side are for self gain at the expense of others versus humbling ourselves to each other in truth and Christ like love there is no point in trying to forge any relationship that resembles what the scriptures portray as good and of God. No forgiveness can occur and certainly reconciliation is a pipe dream without honest motivations being the foundation upon which we build. I have no interest personally to build upon a faulty foundation in this matter as I believe it would be a colossal waste of time.

Gordy